An Unlovable Frump

high  heelsIt is a truth universally acknowledged that a woman in flat shoes will forever remain a frumpy, dumpy singleton. According to Amanda Platell anyway.

The journalist and previous press secretary to William Hague when he was leader of the Conservatives, has been reduced to bashing out sexist tosh in an article ‘How a week in flatties left me feeling SO low‘ (how the mighty have fallen, eh?).

The piece is disguised as an ‘experiment’ of a life-long high-heel addict testing flat shoes for a week. In reality, it is a two-pronged call to arms for women to a) attract a man and b) strive to appear slimmer (to attract a man).

Amanda’s verdict – in suitably childish, petulant language, ranges from ‘….he looked at me as though I was Frodo’s mum: a short, portly hobbit with weird feet’ to ‘(I was) walking flat-footed like a duck – and looking like one too’ to ‘flatties make you a fattie’. Incisive journalism at it’s best.

To ram the point home, she descends into even more offensive language. After testing a pair of £149 black velvet slippers from Pretty Ballerinas and being teased by a friend more used to seeing her in heels, she writes, ‘The ignominy, the shame. A slut who leaves home in her slippers! Move over, Vicky Pollard.’

So according to Amanda, if you wear flats, you’re not only a frump, but a frumpy slut. Furthermore, women in flat shoes have no hope of ever finding love. We must put our own needs to one side and strive to revert to the bad old days of dressing for men. Amanda is clear on this – ‘while women might love the comfort and stylish insouciance of flat shoes, men hate them. They’re just not sexy. There was never a pair of ‘kiss me quick’ or ‘fancy me’ flat shoes. They don’t exist.’

Who is this more offensive to – men or women? I’d be seriously worried if I met the man of my dreams and he spent the entire time looking longingly at my feet, rather than gazing in to my eyes and actually engaging in conversation.

She can keep her pathetic Cinderella fantasies, forever waiting for her Prince Charming to turn up, stiletto heel in hand. As for me, flats may limit my clothing choices, but they certainly haven’t dulled my brain. Jog on, Amanda. If you can….

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28 thoughts on “An Unlovable Frump

  1. Ellen says:

    I’ve seen the deformed feet of a friend or two who almost exclusively wear ill-fitting heels and wonder how on earth that’s supposed to be sexy? Hobbling around in pain on permanently misshapen feet is sexy? I guess if you partner up with misogynistic men who enjoy seeing you suffer to please their small-minded fetishes. It’s ridiculous.

    I can only imagine what poor Amanda would make of the granny shoes I wear on my aching feet these days! Tut tut.

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Couldn’t agree more!! How on earth is that sexy?? Bit like feet-binding, no? Can’t believe an article like this is published in a newspaper – especially the use of the word ‘slut’, which personally I find really offensive….

  2. Wh3re did you find that load of tosh?

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Have a guess!! Good old Daily Mail (Fail, Wail). Can people really write stuff like this and get away with it??? In this day and age?

  3. Jenny says:

    The Daily Mail strikes again!!! Give it another 10 years and she’ll have bunions the size of eggs!!
    One good thing about the summer being over is that I can dig out my lovely comfy Clarkes boots – comfy, practical, warm and they look great with some opaque tights and a little skirt – not to mention the woolly socks that are hidden underneath….

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Honestly, I could write an entire blog just based on their paper!
      I too am enjoying my flat suede boots. Most comfy and springy. Not brave enough to wear skirts yet though, lol.

  4. Sally says:

    ‘Jog on’. Love it.

  5. David says:

    My wife only wore high heels to stop her feet sliding off the foot plates on her electric wheelchair, occasionally when confined to bed just to trying them on. If you want your welcome to my calf length rock boots, great for stability. That woman is stupid, x

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Good on your wife! And any contributions to my shoe stash are more than welcome (size 7, lol).
      Yup, was quite surprised. Normally like Amanda Platell’s comments, but that article left me reeling. A ridiculous, stupid article.

  6. Angela Waldram says:

    Here Here and very well said. Just because we are now forced to wear flat shoes doesn’t make us frumpy or slutty. This women is clearly totally ignorant and tunnel visioned in her way of thinking !

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Thank you! Exactly. And anyhow, resorting to playground tactics – I see women all the time teetering away on their heels in obvious pain. Like, really sexy and feminine?

  7. i’m not a shoe gal, always wore boots or sandals lol so i have never understood the appeal of heels. just looks painful to walk, and the amount of women i see falling over doesnt make me want to try a pair, even too look sexy :p

    i’d much rather wear something i am not going to break something by falling an extra 4 inches. thought that way even before being told i had MS

    and i have seen some nice dressy flats, they are out there.

    • stumbling in flats says:

      When I wore heels, I wore boots with a heel! Don’t think I’ve ever worn a pair of high heel shoes – never thought they looked that classy. Small heels, sure, just not the six inch ones.
      Am still on my quest to find a cool pair of flats for my outfit…but I’m being quite fussy I think!

  8. Helen Rolf says:

    Telling it how it is as usual! Don’t stop. Am with you all the way 😉

  9. Sally says:

    I just want heels!!!!!!!! Heels with bows. Heel with animal print. Heels in purple satin. Heeled boots with fur on top. Heels with straps and buckles. Heels with jewels. Heels in red, black, gold, silver, crocodile print, teal and blue.. I just want heels. . Did see a pretty pair if flats by Geox recently though. Ah well, rant over, onwards and upwards. 🙂

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Aggggghhhhh! Now I’m daydreaming again *sigh*.
      Flats are cool too, right??? And my favourite boot-type slippers, which I would quite happily live in all day. But then Daily Mailies would call me a slut, lol.

  10. Sally says:

    Now do you mean slut in the same way as UKIP Godfrey did or perhaps slag or ….

  11. Sally says:

    My friend just posted a ‘Are you Liked, Loathed or Detested By The Daily Mail’ quiz on Facebook. Apparently I am loathed. Good to know.

  12. Oh no! A frumpy slut!! I’m getting a t-shirt made at once, in case anyone can’t tell by my flats. Honestly, this woman is an ass.

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