Tag Archives: Disability Wales

Yes, You Can

I’m really proud to have been presented with the Disability Wales Educational Achievement Award earlier this year.

Now, as their ambassador for education, I would love to see more deaf and disabled women enter higher education studies.

Without the support of a Disability Student Allowance (which you can have for every year of your studies) or the mentors in the Disability Support Team at University, I would never have finished my Masters.

Not a chance. I resigned three times, threw in the towel and stumbled away.

My brain refused to co-operate and I believed that I would never become an academic writer. I’m still not. Thankfully, times have changed and I no longer need to worry about dry, dusty sentences. I google long words and drop them in amongst my original thinking. There are gadgets and software for everything and anything. You name it, they can help.

I actually cried during one support session, my head slumped on my empty pages. I knew what I wanted to say, I just couldn’t say it. My ideas were complex but my writing basic in the extreme. And then the mentors offered a solution.

In my mind, ‘academia’ was the preserve of a particular type of person; lofty, preoccupied with serious, deep, swirly thoughts, a little scatty, prone to meandering off-topic. And they tend to tell you all the time that they don’t have a telly.

One word, Why?

As for me, I was more preoccupied with calculating the minutes it would take me to reach my sofa and remote controls (passport to the world), whether or not I had the energy to put a meal in the microwave or lamenting the ever-growing laundry basket.

Someone once told me, if you can do a degree, you can do a Masters. If you can do a Masters, you can do a PhD. It just takes longer. And this came from a very well-respected tutor.

Years ago, I chose travel over education and it was the best decision ever; I learned languages, immersed myself in different cultures and generally had an incredible time.

I felt quite comfortable with my life choice, until someone close to me called me uneducated and stupid as I didn’t have a degree. And not just once; over and over again. It became a serious bone of contention. No matter that I spoke three languages, I was somehow inferior.

It is this kind of attitude that puts people like me off education. I lived under this assumption for a good few years, feeling second-class and not worthy of a decent job. Education should be for all, but the ivory tower is alive and well.

I was lucky enough to study my degree part-time, with thanks to my then-boss, who let me study at work. But education isn’t all about degrees, awards, outcomes. It’s about immersing yourself in something completely different, but something you are passionate about.

I’m in the middle of putting together a PhD proposal. Just writing that sentence scares me silly. But, if I narrow it down, I basically have 5 years to write a novel. Not bad? And it incorporates MS, so results all round?

Scared? Yup. Can I do it? Not sure. Will I give it a go?

You betcha.

Tagged , , ,

Photoshop Would Be Great, Thanks …

flumpI’m a teeny bit nervous, and for once it’s not down to discovering a Dreaded Brown Envelope from the DWP on my doormat.

Nor is it about waking up to several texts from The Teenager at Uni along the lines of,  ‘Mum, muuuum! Oi! Where are you?’

These are usually sent way past my bedtime so I don’t see them til the morning. I frantically text back, imagining all manner of horrendous possibilities, then curse when I eventually get a reply, ‘No probs, just fancied a pizza and had no money. Soz, Lolz.’

No, my nerves are simply down to having my photograph taken, quite possibly my least favourite activity of all time. I don’t have a good side. I don’t have a not-so-good side. I am just totally un-photogenic. From any angle, I resemble a Flump.

I’ve been made a Disability Wales ambassador for their campaign, #IAmEmbolden, and my role will be to encourage more deaf and disabled women and girls into further education. There will be a ceremony in the Welsh Government building in March, hence some photographs, which will be displayed on the day.

It’s a cause I’m really excited about, as I didn’t realise just how much support there is out there for people like me who need a little extra help with studying. Without it I certainly wouldn’t have completed my degree back when MS started and I absolutely would never have even contemplated taking a Master’s.

So, I’m starting to panic. I want to look calm and encouraging. What to wear? Sitting down or standing up? Hands clasped or at my side? Most importantly, how long can I suck both my stomach and my cheeks in?

I’ve heard about a few tricks – put your tongue on the roof of your mouth and it’ll give you cheekbones. Nope, it makes me look gormless. Be shot from above, and that way they won’t capture your double (triple) chin. Nope, I looked as if I’m trapped in a manhole.

Knowing my luck, I’ll end up posing like someone from one of those catalogues that fall out of the weekend newspapers – pointing at some far off place or pretending to laugh and point at the same time.

I’m putting my faith in Photoshop, in the hope they can tweak a few bits here and there. It’ll be a lot easier than wrapping my entire body in cling-film tonight, turning the heating up full blast and praying I lose 8lb.

As long as I don’t do my fish-face, I’ll be fine. I think.

Tagged , , ,