Vampire season is upon us once more.
We have a mini-heatwave. I have been following the weather forecasts avidly, inwardly rejoicing when I heard there will be showers next week (I live in Wales; by law it must rain at least every few days).
I’m not a kill-joy. I am sooo happy to see people trundling up to Asda’s and back again, cars stocked full of barbecue supplies.
I like to see everyone decked out in summer prints and of course, it’s always a delight to see a whole bunch of men ill-advisedly walking around topless. Eww.
I’ve been invited to a family do tomorrow. They’re well used to me by now – my mum called and said, ‘don’t worry dear, we’ll put you in that dark corner with the parasol over you’. I’ll just shout across the garden when I need more ice cubes to chuck down my t-shirt and let the kids run around squirting me with their water pistols.
I must sound really grumbly. I love the sun, I really do. At a distance. Through the window. Sadly, The Teenager has whipped my large floor fan upstairs as apparently he can’t study without it. Although he seems to study perfectly well at the same time as chatting to his friends on Skype in his impenetrable, grunty language. He’s also recently ‘discovered’ Duran Duran and my house now sounds like an Old Skool Disco.
Anyway, I’m not complaining. Even though I don’t wear flip flops any more – foot drop is a nightmare with them on and it’s not inconceivable that I could catch the front of them, flinging myself forward, face-down on to the nearest available pavement. I have bought some floaty tops and sunglasses. I will hopefully be rocking the chic Continental look; slightly bored and above these childish solar delights.
The good news is, there is the consolation that with MS heat intolerance, it is imperative to self-prescribe ice cream. Emergency Medication. Plus there is the added bonus of having a blast of lovely icy air whenever I open the freezer to admire my range of Ben & Jerry’s.
So this weekend, I will be lurking in dark corners, vampire-esquely. Except I won’t have a lovely pale vampire face. I’ll be the one shining like a bright red beacon, gripping a tub of Phish Food….