Stumbling in Flats

Well, that’s several hours of my life I’ll never get back.

I wanted to buy a plain navy blue t-shirt.

And that’s it.

Not much to ask?

I’ll admit, I’m big, although not excessively over the UK average.

Yet searching online I seemed to fall down a rabbit-hole of ghastliness.

I won’t bore you with the details of my ever-frantic searches, but suffice to say, if you’re a big gal, you bound to wear clothes with:

• Ruffles
• Huge dropped hems at the back
• Sequins and cheap beads
• Ridiculous slogans (no, I don’t ‘Blame It On The Prosecco’)
• Garish patterns, swirls and side-ties (why?)
• Lazy tailoring and all-round general baggy fits, i.e. sacks.
• Lace. Lots and lots of lace.

Even at the higher end price range, the choice was dismal. Nothing was understated and elegant, or just … basic but well made.

In my job as a building project manager, I only spend one or two days a week in ‘normal’ clothes. More often than not I’m in steel-capped boots, cargo trousers and a hoodie. Hair pulled back in a ponytail and some lip balm for the chilly mornings. My other outfit is jim-jams as soon as I get home and fall asleep on the sofa.

So when I wear ‘normal’ clothes, it would be nice to wear something smart but casual. Well-made, classic. I’ve never been known for my fashion sense and never well be, but it’s refreshing to emerge from a cocoon of dust and mud with clean hair and no black bits in my ears.

Back to my tale of woe – a navy blue t-shirt. I dismissed the one with the sequinned pocket and dropped hem. The baggy one. The one with lace inserts. The one slashed in odd places. The one exposing bare shoulders.

Instead, I dug out my huge pile of ‘too fat to fit now, could possibly fit in the future’ clothes from my cupboard. And there, right in the middle, was a lovely t-shirt. Ok, so it has a scattering of tiny beads, but they’re so small I might snip them off.

If I breathe in, it fits perfectly.

I might not be able to talk much, but it makes a change from my hoodie?