My cunning strategies seem to be working. Often it’s the small(ish) things.
Such as, I hate the heat and it hates me back with a blazing passion.
Now though, rather than worrying about my tomato face, I plan a set time outside, give myself one last blast of the air-con and pop on the sunglasses.
I can often be found lingering at the chest freezers in Iceland and worry they’ll ban me soon as I only ever buy eggs.
Who cares if I’m bright red? I’m out, it’s enough. And when my legs start to buckle I know it’s time to grab a Slush Puppie and head back to the car, mission accomplished. When I’m in work, the boss agrees to go easy on me as long as he can still laugh when I stumble. Who cares? We’re good friends going back years and I don’t want anyone to tip-toe around me (wish I could do that without losing my balance and falling over – sigh).
As regular readers are aware, I’ve also signed up with a personal trainer. Who’d have thought it even a few months ago? My Nike joggy bottoms didn’t arrive in time for my first session, but who cared that I turned up in jeans and an Andy Warhol t-shirt? Certainly not the trainer who still made me learn how to execute a perfect squat, which was surprisingly difficult. Ceiling to floor length mirrors didn’t make the job any easier. But I did it. And I’m going back next week.
Only problem is, I got a little bit carried away afterwards. The Teenager came home from school to find me saying, ‘hey, look, look at this! (squat) look what I can do! (squat)’ Naturally he was less than impressed and retreated backwards to his bedroom, on his phone, no doubt tweeting my sorry plight to his mates. I paid for it the next day though, barely being able to walk down the stairs. Pesky muscles screaming in shock at being used for the first time in years.
Anyway, I finally knew that I was officially ‘back’ on Saturday. I’d arranged to meet a good friend for dinner, meeting first at his place. Great. Did my hair, got dressed, fed the cat and left. I knocked on his door:
Me: Dinner? Arranged the other day? My kid’s away, your kids are away?
Him: (spluttering and looking back longingly at his Lord of The Rings dvd on pause) But, honestly, I really didn’t think you’d turn up. You’re always so tired. Was expecting a text from you to say you couldn’t come. As usual. You okay?
Me: I’m good. I’m great! I’ll wait, you get ready. Got any chocolate in the fridge?