Tag Archives: bacon sarnies

Plots And Plans

world dominationWhen I was first diagnosed with MS, a trusted health professional asked me, ‘so when will you be giving up work then?’

An outdated concept perhaps, but it got worse.

By the end of the fateful day I disclosed my MS at work, plans were underway to get rid of me as quickly as possible.

Just over a year later, and after not taking the very obvious hints, I was unceremoniously sacked on a dreary Monday morning.

Work and MS. It hasn’t really been a great story for me so far. On the bright side though, my friend has been employing me for over a year now while I look for a new job. The downside is he doesn’t run a cool cafe or bijoux boutique, but a construction company.

I normally work from home doing boring thrilling admin (pyjamas, toast and cat – hope the boss isn’t reading), but sometimes, if I promise to behave, he allows me on site. This week, I was let out to drive a mini dumper truck. Basically sitting down all day, tootling up a lane and back. Not that different from sitting down all day tootling to the kitchen and back, except I had an emergency stop button and the coffee was lousy.

I was given a quick lesson first, ‘this is stop, this is go and this is a steering wheel.’ Yup, got it. Woolly hat on and I was ready to go. To cut a long story short, it’s not that exciting after the first couple of goes. The highlight of my day was waving to a toddler who was peering through the window shouting ‘Bob! It’s Bob the Builder! But mummy, it’s a girl!’

Anyway, as I was tootling along, I realised I really should get a proper job. I’ve tried, I really have. I’m signed up to all the job sites, I scroll through pages and pages of thrilling career opportunities but still there is nothing out there. I’ve moved seamlessly from being restricted by childcare commitments to being restricted by MS.

I know I’m lucky. I couldn’t ask for a better boss, I’ve learned a huge amount and can now read architectural plans like a pro. I even have my own pink drill (honestly). But plans are afoot. I can’t go far in the construction world when I can’t even go up a ladder.

But you know what? I’ll miss the bacon sarnies, the camaraderie and the filthy jokes. What other job can offer all that? Answers on a postcard….

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Getting Plastered

Back to work, but luckily the builder’s son is doing a week’s work experience with him, so at least there is someone as incompetent as me on the job.

A very large skip was delivered early, so our first lesson was how to load it correctly. All flat stuff in first, then stack the edges with other, bigger flat stuff.

Finally, place all the rubble sacks on top. To finish off, all the gaps are plugged with baguette wrappers, coke cans and old Sun newspapers.  I just thought you chucked everything in, squished it down and hoped for the best.

On a break, I got chatting to the painter. Anyone else ever find when they mention MS, someone will always say, ‘ Oh, I knew someone with MS. Terrible it was. Just awful. Downhill like that (clicks fingers loudly).’ Oh, cheers mate. That’s supposed to make me feel better?

We moved on to the plastering. Quite possibly the most boring, tedious, soul-destroying job ever. All I have to do is follow the builder round and round the room, scooping out plaster for him. Yawn. Then clean out the buckets. Yawn. Then do it all again. Then we wait for it to dry, then go over it again and repeat five or six times.

Last job, pipe work. So boring I won’t even go into details, suffice to say it’s maths with bits of copper. Some jobs just drag. And I was freezing, even though I was wearing the woolly thermals my mum bought me. It was one of those days. Next time will be better as the kitchen units will be delivered and I can hopefully make myself more useful.

Mid-way through the day, The Teenager texted me to say his wrist was sore again (see Muddy Hell for details…). I texted back that I would bandage it up when he got home, and no, he couldn’t have a Domino’s pizza for dinner to make him feel better.

I got home tired, cold and sore. Maybe I will take up the builder’s idea that I start up his social media instead of helping fit kitchens? He wants to create a Twitter account for his business, so must start thinking of suitable, buildery-type tweets. Something like – Blimey, the price of bacon sarnies is shocking…….

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