Thinking Of You…

thinking of youWhen I was growing up in Glasgow, my mum had a friend with two kids.

We spent countless sleepovers at their house over the years, the mums in the kitchen talking while we played outside or watched tv.

After moving to Wales when I was 14, contact was patchy. Life moved on and we all grew older as the years flew by.

I often wondered what they were doing, how their lives had turned out.

In August this year, one of them got back in touch, the one I went to nursery with. It felt amazing to have a renewed connection with Glasgow. He teased me about how my accent had changed and sometimes I barely understood what he was saying in his broad Glaswegian accent.

We had long phone conversations, reminiscing, catching up, having a laugh. He became my harshest blog critic and threw himself into researching MS and all that it meant. We planned to meet up when his work was less busy and he had recovered from a planned operation.

Quite suddenly, contact became sporadic and during our last phonecall he told me he’d be out of touch for a few months as he was going away to recuperate after surgery.

This morning, my mum told he she had received a letter from his family. He died in October.

Grief is selfish. I’m seething at the unfairness of it. I’m devastated someone could die so suddenly at the age of 40. I’m angry.

Life is short. I hope he’s looking down on me from wherever he is. If he is, he’ll no doubt still be encouraging me to get out there, make the most of my life. I hope I do.

14 thoughts on “Thinking Of You…

  1. Oh, no! That’s just awful. Very sad to hear about your friend. It’s good you got back in touch, however briefly. XOXO

    • stumbling in flats says:

      I’m definitely glad we had the chance to catch up, that’s for sure. And I was looking forward to picking up contact again once he’d recovered. Just goes to show you, I guess.

  2. Beverley says:

    So sorry to hear that darling.
    I follow you avidly; I live with MS too and you somehow seem to write exactly how I’m feeling!

    Stay strong, he’ll be looking down on you

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Thank you so much Beverley. It’s just been a terrible shock really.
      Even though I hadn’t physically seen him for well over 20 years, we spoke so much for those few months this year.

  3. Sally says:

    It’s hard sometimes isn’t it . I just heard last night that my best friend back in Scotland’s dad collapsed and died of a heart attack on Thursday while working on his farm. Funeral tomorrow. Still remember her mum dying a few years ago from cancer. Times like this I wished I lived closer to my family. It was really nice that you managed to reconnect though.

    • stumbling in flats says:

      It sure is. It was so lovely to have a blast from the past back in my life, after being away from Glasgow so long.
      But yup, the best thing is we had the chance to catch up, however brief.

  4. Shandy says:

    Big love xxxxxx

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Thank you! I know it might seem daft as we hadn’t seen each other in decades, but after planning to meet up and all the conversations we had, it just seems so sad.

  5. 🙁 *virtual hugs* sorry to read, but its good that you did get to talk again, however brief it was

    and I can’t understand the Glasgow accent, need a translator ;p

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Thank you. I guess I’m lucky really. I’ve been thinking how I would feel if we hadn’t had that chance to catch up.
      I really, really struggled with his accent sometimes and he would tease me for my ‘posh’ voice. But as we had the same cultural reference points, it was great fun to talk and fill in the previous years.
      He was your typical Glasgow character, forthright and opinionated but with a heart of gold.

  6. Angela says:

    Oh that’s so sad and my heart goes out to you. Stay strong and cry lots. Bit of a contradiction but I’m guessing you will know what I mean. Sending lots of love xxxx

  7. Angela says:

    I knew you would understand what I meant. Life can throw a cruel hand sometimes but when that happens we need to meet it head on and play the cards. It’s painful but makes you stronger in the long run. Sending you lots of love

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