Blazing Rows…

prefectOur tranquil little cottage has become a battleground, with neither me nor The Teenager willing to give way. There have been tears, sulks and door slamming and I’ve apologised to the neighbours who rolled their eyes and said, ‘Teenagers, eh?’ in sympathetic tones.

He’s even attempted a hunger strike but lasted only until I stocked the fridge with his favourite Müller yoghurts and waved a pizza under his nose.

The cause of all this conflict? His school is adopting a new uniform policy as of September. From the age of four, The Teenager has gone to school in some variation of a polo top and school jumper. Now his high school want to have a smarter uniform so the kids no longer look like over-grown infants and I’m all for it. We got the final uniform list a couple of days ago and he remains distinctly unimpressed.

‘Oh, lovely, you have to wear a blazer!’

‘Yeah, with, like, gold piping. I’m not a girl. I’m not wearing it. They can’t make me. It’s like, rank.’

‘But they wear them in Waterloo Road. Very smart.’

‘Yeah, whatever. Still not wearing it. It’s against my yooman rights’

‘Well, look, you get a nice tie as well! Very grown up. Why’s it a clip on one though? What’s wrong with a proper one?’

‘Like, duh, it’s so we don’t strangle each other. Elf ‘n’ safety, innit?’

And so we go round in circles. He’s trying to organise a boycott for September, but few of his friends are brave/daft enough to join him. The uniform is due to land in the shops within the next couple of weeks and he’s coming with me whether he likes it or not. This may involve an after-school swoop, where I thrust a packet of crisps into his hand, bundle him into the car and lock the doors from the inside.

I have tried to reason with him, but as soon as I started a conversation with the words, ‘when I was your age….’ he huffed and puffed, stomped upstairs and blasted his music out (Oasis, full volume, same two songs in an endless loop).

I will win this argument but the next battle will be trying to take his photograph in his brand new shiny uniform on the first day of Year 10, minus the rude gestures. And there was me thinking the toddler years were the worst.

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18 thoughts on “Blazing Rows…

  1. Sue says:

    Oh I love the quote “when I was your age” I’d have got from my year 10 son “you mean when dinossaurs were still around” Kids eh don’t you just love them, although I couldn’t eat a whole one!! Lol

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Yup! My son’s gobsmacked I actually existed before the internet, lol. He looks on me with pity, love him.

  2. IanO says:

    Hmmm difficult one. When I attended school in the 70’s there was a school uniform but my mother could not afford it, my father having died when I was ten years old. I was given special dispensation (along with many others) to appear ‘neat and tidy’ this my mother achieved with some aplomb. I have always believed that school uniform was designed to present a level playing field (no pun intended) for all pupils. This was easily bypassed by the wealthier parents who sent their sons to school in high end school blazers, trousers and shirts.

    I quite like the idea of everyone looking neat and tidy but do you not think uniforms stifle their individuality?

    Good luck with this one! As always you have my admiration for the way you cope with life’s problems with a smile on your lips 🙂

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Thank you! Got to look on the bright side. I try!
      I know what you mean – uniforms blur the ‘status’ of the kids but kids aren’t daft – they still know who the wealthy or poor ones are just by where they go on holiday, what computer they have, etc.
      I do think uniforms stifle identity – why can’t the kids just wear what they want so they can start experimenting with who they are? Why wait til they’re 18??

  3. also probably a clip on because if its anything like the kids here wearing ties, they either don’t know how to tie them, or they are tied so loose the knot is half way down their jackets/shirts

    i am sooo glad we didnt have uniforms in high school, yes it would have made getting dressed for the day easier, but i think it really hinders the individuality of young people

    • stumbling in flats says:

      I agree! But I’m glad they’re not wearing those hideous jumpers any more – really does make them look like toddlers, lol.
      Guess clip on is easier for ties – made me laugh about the reason though!!

      • you could still strangle someone tho with a clip on, use the rest of the tie o.0 i read too many horror books :p

        too warm in canada to wear jumpers to school, kids would be dropping like flies in the spring time :p

        • stumbling in flats says:

          Very true! Just don’t tell the Teenager, lol.
          I’m dreading the new term starting in September – god knows how I’m going to wrestle him into his uniform! Plus he has to start wearing button-down white shirts rather than polo tops. That’ll be fun!

  4. Ah, takes me back to the summer before senior year. We were told the entire student body would be forced to wear uniforms…except for the seniors (at least, for the first year of this policy). YAY! It was fun to laugh at the younger students wearing the dark blue polyester pants and stiff, light blue shirts. No ties or blazers though (we were in the tropics, so I guess it might’ve been a bit warm). I was *slightly* envious that the Uniform Wearers didn’t have to spend ages figuring out what to wear every morning. (“Wait — did I wear that outfit last Monday? Mustn’t repeat it too soon!!!”) It all seemed so IMPORTANT back then.

    • stumbling in flats says:

      They’re doing a phased-in plan at his school too. Out of 7 years, only two of them will have to wear it from September. The Teenager is not amused.
      But it does take away that morning angst. He spends long enough getting his very short hair just right, so if he had to choose what to wear every day, he’d have to get up two hours earlier!

  5. Caroline says:

    I know what you mean, it doesn’t help that the reports that I have had from those who have seen the said uniform is that it looks like Harry Potter! I say that they should all go in to school in September wearing round Harry-esq glasses to complete the look!

  6. Sandy says:

    The Teenager here goes into a shirt and tie for sixth form in sept. What he doesn’t know is MS gives me a great excuse for not ironing those shirts so he’ll be doing it himself!

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Arggghhh! Just realised his shirts will need ironing, unlike his polos. Oh well. I have a fridge magnet that says ‘MAN can iron’. Subliminal messaging?

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