There’s an insightful documentary on Netflix, ‘End Game’, about end-of-life care. It’s a beautifully moving film and I highly recommend it.
One of the doctors explained that ‘suffering’ is the gap we experience between how our lives were and how they are now, and this hit a real chord with me. It’s all about acceptance, right?
Although he was talking about the End Game, it was a powerful and invigorating point.
We are diagnosed, we grieve, we accept.
We gather ourselves together and get on with life, however short it may be.
It sums up what I’ve been tussling and struggling with these last six years.
All of us who are diagnosed with an incurable and degenerative illness face loss, and it’s incremental. We may not be at death’s door, but the loss is there and potent. We may have to accept our jobs are under threat, our partners lose patience, our friends drift away.
Should we accept that this has happened and if we don’t, are we still suffering? Perhaps:
- I could have pressed my ex-employer for more compensation, but I chose not to stoop to their level.
- I should have been worried when the government and the media started spewing out anti-disabled/benefits propaganda?
Suffering to acceptance is a very, very difficult journey for anyone to make, far less someone with an illness such as MS.
So, say we get through all that, as I hope I have. My son is fine, my MS is governable. Right, next stop, Acceptance?
I think this is only true at a micro level, which I think an illness such as MS thrives upon, for the good. MS brings us up short. We do smell the roses. We are normally young so have the chance to change our lives.
It may not be absolute acceptance, but it’s half-way there?