Is there one to MS?
It’s up to us. I’ve established that MS is:
- Crappily forever
So. Life with MS is crap. On a dramatic level, it took my father from me, at the age of 35. I was 4 and a half.
On a less-dramatic level, I hope I can show that life with MS is not The End.
Strangely, I have a lot to be thankful for:
- Life is wonderful and I now live it day by day.
- Life is unexpected.
- Life is a learning curve.
Ok. So, I was bitterly, utterly depressed for a full two years following my diagnosis. Not helped by a toxic working environment. Or having my partner leave without a backwards glance. Or … you get my meaning.
Anyway, almost three years down the line from The Diagnosis, I have finally realised that MS is here to stay. And if it’s here to stay, then I might as well get used to it. I actually struggle to remember life pre-MS. It shook me (us) up, it rocked the foundations of our lives and it had no mercy. What it left was a tidal quake of regrets, sighs and a lot of evaluation.
So, it rocked my life, and how. I was ‘lucky’. I was not as young as my father, who left before we knew him. I was not so old as to be set in my ways. I was 37. The Teenager was just moving from 11 to 12, seismic in Teenage years. I’d had my wild, crazy years and could still bore anyone passing with my reminiscences.
Me and The Teenager have gone through it all pretty much alone. We’ve had tears, tantrums and turmoil. Now we are in GCSE year, we’re shifting back to how it should be: me nagging him, rather than him reminding me to walk carefully.
It’s been a journey, to use a hackneyed phrase. Are we through the worst? I don’t think so. But that’s another challenge, for another day.