The Return of The Angry Red Tomato-Face

angry red tomato faceMen in loud-patterned shorts and flip-flops are everywhere, I have a stack of special offer leaflets from supermarkets urging me to stock up on barbecue ingredients and the weather forecasters can barely contain their excitement.

We are having a spell of warm, sunny weather and I am not best pleased. In fact, I am downright grumpy. Two years ago I enjoyed the warm weather as much as anyone, but one day that all changed as my face morphed into an angry red blur, my limbs went weak and I felt faint with fatigue. Since then Uhthoff’s phenomenon, otherwise known as heat intolerance, has made my life a misery.

A tiny spot of sun will add a youthful, flushed glow to my face. Any more than that and I begin to scare small children. I often wish I was born 100 years ago so I could carry a parasol when outdoors and recline on a chaise-lounge, delicately fluttering a fan  and sipping peppermint tea when the heat gets too much. And a bonnet would be ideal for bad hair days.

It’s not just weather that does this – hot radiators in the winter, ‘atmospheric’ log fires in gastropubs and over-heated shops all take their toll. Opening the oven door is a tricky operation. Do it too quickly and I’ve got to lie down for five minutes, pizza sadly forgotten.

I fondly remember giving myself home-made facials by adding lavender to a bowl of boiling water and steaming my face over it. Nowadays that would probably be the best way to make me give up my PIN numbers and passwords.

I am now a semi-vampire, hiding in the house as much as I can and my super-size fan is my new best friend. I have become an expert at judging where any breeze is coming from. I rearrange chairs in cafes when a blast of sun comes through the window.

So this bank holiday weekend, I will mostly be at home. I will not be going to a barbecue – it’s insanity to cook in the heat. I will not be going to the beach. I will not be sitting outside a pub.  I will instead smile through gritted teeth when yet another person says, ‘oooh, lovely weather we’re having!’ Isn’t it just…

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12 thoughts on “The Return of The Angry Red Tomato-Face

  1. You’d look simply darling in a bonnet. You could be on the vanguard of a fashion trend, I tell you…

    Enjoy your holiday weekend! (*Bank* holiday, indeed. Hrumph!)

  2. Uhthoff’s phenomenon, its nasty. Its been my downfall more than once. Think I’m a bit more tolerant than you.

    The real horror is when body temperature goes much above 37, ie when I’m ill

    • stumbling in flats says:

      It’s not easy. I melt at the slightest hint of sun! Just makes life even more difficult than usual.

  3. Ellen says:

    Oh yes! Ugh! I live in what is normally a tiny patch of cool weather along the coast in the far northwest corner of California, but we’re having a heatwave at the moment. Everyone is practically wetting themselves with excitement over our “wonderful” weather. I just feel like lying down with ice water in a cave.

    • stumbling in flats says:

      I feel for you! It’s hard too as you can’t join in with all the excitement. People go crazy in this country at the merest glimmer of sun and I’m just like, uggghhhh.

  4. Anita says:

    I carry a small can of cooling spray everywhere with me or one of those small battery fans. You can also buy a cooling jacket that has been designed or ms patients that is worn under your clothes. If you are interested I will find out for you. I or got my spray last week when I attended my daughters violin concert and much to my embarrassment I fainted and symptoms got a lot worse for several hours. Lucky I was already in the wheelie so they didn’t have to pick me up off the floor!! Xx

    • stumbling in flats says:

      You poor thing, that’s awful. It’s so horrible. I can feel quite ill with the heat at times. I would love to know more about the jacket?
      I had a little mini fan last summer but always felt so self-conscious! Bit like starting to use a walking stick, lol.

  5. Samantha Thompson says:

    I nearly wet myself laughing 🙂
    Great post. I would love to be able to celebrate warmer weather but I just can’t, it’s awful and I feel horrid.

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Thank you!
      I’ve just left a family get together earlier than I would have liked as everyone was sitting in the conservatory. I thought I could handle it. Nah. MS had better ideas!

  6. Mark says:

    I was watching football today and looking at the sky with dread as I could see the clouds moving along , I looked in horror as the sun eventually emerged and it’s heat reached me.. I moved towards the lift where I wished for the cold to come back. But then ill be freezing , just can’t win with this illness.

    • stumbling in flats says:

      Very true. There’s never really an ‘ideal’ temperature for me, it’s too specific.
      Hope the football was good? At least they didn’t lose, lol.

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