The shops are full of chocolate and cakes, magazines are stuffed with recipes, we’ve got two bank holidays and the kids are bouncing off the walls with excitement and e-numbers. Easter is rapidly turning into Christmas Mark II.
I’m not complaining. I love Easter. So much so that I put up my Easter branches (in lieu of a tree) weeks and weeks ago. I’m looking forward to lazing on my sofa watching ‘Gone With The Wind’ for the 27th time, pausing the telly only to hunt out more chocolate.
(Handy hint for MSers – don’t bother buying those teeny-weeny chocolate eggs wrapped in foil. If your hands are dodgy, like mine, the teeth-gnashing frustration really isn’t worth the effort. Just buy several large ones instead).
Anyway, The Teenager is away for a week, so it’s just me and the cat rattling around the house. The laundry basket is empty, the fridge is fully-stocked and I am going to use this time as a period of quiet reflection. I have decided to re-hash my New Year’s resolutions, giving myself another chance to fail at unlocking my true potential.
My resolutions, in no particular order, are: eat less, exercise more, try new things and learn how to make a decent Hollandaise sauce. My emotional resolution is to stop being so hard on myself. I get frustrated and angry when MS fatigue drives me to the sofa yet again, when I bale out on friends or have to go to bed early. I still raise my son, study, work and run a house, so maybe I should cut myself some slack.
It’s strange, but sometimes I forget I have MS. I just think, oh, that’s the feet buzzing again or here comes the fatigue and whoops, nearly fell over there. It’s become such a part of my life and it brings me up with a sharp shock when I think, ‘oh yeah, I’ve got multiple sclerosis.’
So this Easter, with The Teenager away, I am going to indulge myself. I will be meeting up with friends (fingers crossed), reading trashy novels and magazines, trying out new recipes and chilling. I am going to be kind to myself, something I have really neglected to do recently.
I know what you mean about sometimes forgetting you have ms. That doesn’t mean I don’t think about it everyday, there’s always some point when my fingers go tingly or I get up from my desk and get that buzz down my spine. I think it just becomes part of daily life. I’m slowly getting used to my new “normal”, fortunately I think things are still improving, I’ve had 3 tysabri now and am feeling pretty good. Sometimes I actually can’t believe I’ve got ms but its given me hope that, for the time being, life can be good. We just learn to put up with our little “quirks”.
I’m sorry if this upsets anyone as I know that this is not the case for everyone but at the moment I’m in a glass half full kind of mood – must be all the chocolate I’ve already consumed!
Have a lovely Easter xx
Thank you so much for your comment. I was a bit hesitant about writing that I ‘forgot about having MS’ as I too didn’t want to isolate people who are in constant pain. What I wanted to convey was exactly what you said – we seem to assimilate all the changes into our lives, then get a shock when we suddenly remember we have MS.
I think about MS every single day, but if I compare and contrast how I was two years ago to how I am now, I’m a totally different person, physically and mentally. It’s amazing what we put up with and what quickly becomes normal.
I’m so glad to hear Tysabri is working well for you. That was my alternative treatment option and I’ve heard great things about it. I too feel hopeful that the Alemtuzumab has halted MS in its tracks, for now. It hasn’t and won’t reverse the damage already done, but at least I have breathing space from the constant relapses.
Happy Easter to you too and indulge yourself!
I’m pleased to hear your treatment is doing its job! I’m off skiing for a week which I’m slightly terrified about but excited to be going away. I’ve always been a cautious skier attempting to keep up with the family, just hoping I can still do it. I have a feeling I’ll be having lots of hot chocolate stops (with a tipple of rum for courage!).
Have a lovely Easter xx
Wow! I gave up skiing after one dismal attempt. The toddlers whizzing past me put paid to my plans sharpish, lol. Have a fab time, enjoy the apres ski!
I went to the doctor a few months back and she was telling me that i needed to slow down and take things easy. I said to her that “I accept the slap on the wrists!”. Her response was “I’m not slapping you on the wrists Allyson, I’m patting you on the back. You’re doing amazingly well but sometimes you have to remember that you do have MS and that if you don’t stop and take a breath you will suffer later on!”.
After that I look at things with the attitude of ‘would anyone notice if i didn’t do it today?’… for example, would anyone notice that I didn’t do my ironing today, if I had a rest and did it tomorrow? Would anyone notice if I didn’t cook dinner and bought take-away for my and the boyfriend?!? Would anyone notice if I left the hoovering until another night?!? NOT LIKELY!
Exactly right. I’m still so guilty of trying to carry on as normal when my body just won’t let me. I really need to go a bit easier on myself as it’s stressing me out. Not good for MS, lol.
I try not to feel guilty when I order online from the supermarket or treat The Teenager to a takeaway.
I also iron way less than before and try not to stress about dust. Dimmer lights are great, just adjust and you don’t see it!
So hopefully I will use this long weekend to prioritise things and give myself a pat on the back too! I’m still the same person, just slightly altered.
Happy Easter to you too! Do be kind to yourself; that’s a resolution I need to work on as well!
Enjoy your long weekend!
p.s. Wow, three exclamation marks! Aren’t I jolly? (Must be that Christmas spirit and all…)
Loving those exclamation marks, Ms CrankyPants. Was beginning to think I was the only one!!
Yup, I think this year’s Easter message for MSers is – take it easy on yourselves. Be kind!
Have a good one, Cranky and Happy Christmas,
Hi all, and Happy Easter !!
Hey I just wanted to say something to Jenny’s comment, ( which I think was a great comment) , but please try not to feel sorry about how great your feeling right now ,hell you have every right to be in a good place right now w/ your MS,and you should feel good about expressing how well you feel!! I love it when I read blogs and comments from MSers who are doing so well,at least for me it helps me to remember that even the bad days can and often do get better,even if these times don’t last to long, I’ve come to really appreciate my good days or my good moments in a day!! And hearing from folks like yourself and so many of the regulars I see here on this blog is a huge upper (FOR ME ANYWAYS), and in my opinion if your having a good day and you want others to know that you are then go for it,hex shout it from atop a mountain if you want!!! Try not to feel bad about having a good day,because hearing about other MSers who are doing well makes it easier for me to remember that it could be worse,and MSers sticking together means doing for bad times as well as the good ones…
Anyways as I often do I’m babbling so I will just say ” Thanks Alot” for sharing and I’m glad your in such a good place w/ your treatments , and as always this was a great post, I hope everyone has a great Easter !!! <3 X 🙂
Happy Easter Scot!
Exactly, we should all be happy for fellow MSers when they’re on a roll, and be there for them when they’re not so good.
I love your comments!
Thanks Scot! I’ve only just seen your comment. I haven’t been online much as I’ve been out on the slopes all day! I remember when I was awaiting diagnosis I spent ages trawling the Internet and it was always the positives about people doing normal stuff that kept me feeling positive myself.
So yes, I thinks you’re right, we should share the good and the bad, we’re in it together!!
Anyhow – I’m in La Rosiere, the sun is shining, my face is glowing, the snow is perfect, my legs are sore from a day of skiing and the beer is chilling!